"How do I get my sex life back?
This Is a common question we Tantra teachers hear.
As a global Tantric practitioner & teacher based in Sydney, I’m humbled when so many people bare their souls; conflicted as they express their desire for a meaningful sex life.
However, whilst I have empathy, I'm really amazed by how few want to commit to change.
Like anything, ( for example, say you want to build muscles - you’d join a gym and keep working out over months before seeing & feeling the results). It’s about commitment & discipline.
It’s the same deal with our relationship to our intimate side of life. So if you've booked an intimacy coaching session to speak with me about how to feel 'alive and sexy' again, clearly it's because you're ready to move forward.
'Do you still love him/her/yourself?' I ask.
'No, no. Nothing. In fact I feel we've reached an impasse and pretty much dislike each other - but you know how it is, I'm staying for the kids. It's been 20 years.' S/he says, looking at me like this is the norm and therefore accepted.
And sadly for many, it is!
Without any further detail, the point I'm reaching is this.
We are living in difficult times. Many of us are confronted with the challenge of abundance.
And let's be honest - we all want to remain where we feel safe. But that’s not always where we find happiness.
Some people want their sex lives back but not with their current spouse, and some just want out of the relationship altogether- but again it's the worry about money that keeps them entrapped in a cycle of co-dependency & denial.
Of course I feel empathy in relation to family dynamics and the upheaval a separation may cause. However it's much more difficult to meander through excuses and blocks when the real truth may be this; some people just don't want to face being financially independent. I'm not talking about young families here either, which I can understand given the difficulty of being a single parent and rising Sydney costs.
It's when a 50 year old man tells me he doesn't want to discuss Tantric practice or learn skills to introduce to his wife because he's not into her anymore that I feel somewhat annoyed.
He wants to stay but he also wants ...well, he's not sure and although I flagged the value of seeing a sexworker he cringed; not into 'that' idea at all! He thought surrogacy would be on offer - but it's not. He's married and needs to navigate that by having a conversation at home. He needs to decide if he's in - or out of that relationship (the kids are adults now).
And as for women? I met one woman who is having an affair until her husband gave an ultimatum; get help or get out. She actually doesn't love him, and by the end of our session she concluded , 'Well, he's a good husband. And I know I won't really find one better; truth is he loves me and I can't afford to leave!'
Anyway, this is a snapshot of Sydney's suburban sex and love life problems.
Let's not fear the reality. Let’s speak up & make change!
Often It's all about the money (religion, culture, family expectations...), so, coaching offered within a Tantric principled framework is able to support your overall relationship with self and others - in more ways than just sexual...it’s about living an ecstatic lifestyle every day!
So, If you're feeling stuck and overwhelmed right now, lets chat and put together a solution focussed strategy - shame, guilt & judgment free.
You can and you WILL reclaim a passionate sex & love life once again.
We just need to introduce you back to your true self so that you may reclaim your confidence + replenished sexual essence.
Love Taryn x
(See Taryn’s Practitioner Page Link here on STM for more info or book your Tantra coaching, relationship therapy or Chakra healing here today)